Love is a Choice

Wednesday, June 4 | 0 comments




"SHMILY"

October 24, the date when the colors in life danced with me. The day when my prayers were answered after the struggles that came through my way. Yes, I found him, I found the love of my life, I felt the perfection in life. I have no wish anymore after that, because every single day I thank God He gave me the guy who loved me, the guy who can take care of me than before, the guy who completes me, the guy who supports me, the guy who treats me like a princess, like his Queen, like his half..

I always say Good Morning to him because every morning is another day to love him, to thank him, to cherish him, to make him happy..

I always say "Lunch na tayo" because I want him healthy, I know that work is important to him but some days he couldn't have his lunch because he's too busy at work and sometimes he doesn't like the food.

I always say Good Night because I want him to sleep well without any doubts nor worries, I want him to feel he's special before he goes to sleep. I always thank him also as possible that I could everytime he exerts effort. And I never missed my Goodnight messages without "I love you more", because I want him to know that I love him so much and not because in the past, past is past and it will stay a past and I will not let my past ruin my future..

I know this is tough, I know moving on takes time to heal. I know that he still misses her at some time even though he doesn't tell me, because I know I cannot beat 8 years, I know that.. But because I love him, I accepted it until I confronted him about it..

June 02 2014, same week last year when he left me.. Who would probably forget the time when you lost your love? It's already one year when my life starts fading, the colors in my life starts to gray, the most painful I've encountered.. Being compared. I still remember those days, it was remarkable. Then he came back, yes, it was my birthday. I'm so happy because he came back, because he loved me again. But those days I already felt that he still doesn't forget her. I didn't tell him because I know it's true. And now, it did happened again.. I started to hate myself, why does my love always leave me?..

I let him go, it hurts yes but I must let him. I can't stop crying even in my office, I just really can't.. I always pray for his happiness, I hope he finds his way, his real happiness, the Prince I know, his real him and I'll be okay on that. They say everything is not permanent, you just have to love it no matter what, take care of it, fight for it and accept it so that it will be yours, forever.. But..

I guess it will be the end of us, he didn't chose me. Yes, "Love is a choice", and then I realized.. He didn't chose me the 3rd time..

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Deenerys Targaryen